I am going to be honest, I am so thankful 2013 is over.
I was going to peruse my blog posts for the past year and try to pull some themes. Except... there are really a few overarching events that standout in my mind that have influenced my life in 2013. One of which I've kept secret, and although I'm not ready to share here, publicly, yet- this one, extremely difficult, thing has shadowed everything I've done over the past year.
2013 saw a change in my career: my job was reduced to part time for five months which was difficult financially for Andrew and I. Although I put myself out there for a private practice, I was fortunate to get another part time component in September and this has proven another challenging and rewarding career decision.
Andrew and I have purchased a house- 2013 marked a definite year of grieving the end of urban (and "youthful") living. I'm hopeful that the emotions that have arisen over the past year around this decision have allowed me to prepare for this new change. Now more than ever I feel ready to leave apartment living and welcome the privacy of living in the Quiet of semi-rural.
My yoga practice has become 100% home practice, mostly due to financial reasons. Despite this, due to the emotional instability and general high level of stress throughout the year, I have learned little about my body and my practice in 2013. This past year has been about surviving and for the first time in five years I have broken out in hives and have seen the return of night terrors.
Looking forward in 2014, I feel it's time to take back some space for me and move beyond "survival mode" into nourishing mode. Already I have taken steps with various medical appointments with my fabulous new GP (who is bilingual!) for January, a follow up with my Naturopath (who has forever changed my quality of life- I am now a believer), and a slow return to a more dedicated yoga and creativity practice.
What I have learned in 2013? That holding onto grief doesn't help. That perfectionism doesn't help and that my career is not the measure of who I am. What my body can and can't do shouldn't shape my ability to be happy.
Lately I have been finding joy in the every day moments, conversations and interactions. I have been feeling content with my yoga practice consisting of playing the guitar, laughing with friends and relaxed evenings watching movies with the love of my life.
I have been moving on and letting go.