Monday, October 28, 2013

My jeans are too tight: battling with a lifetime of bad self talk

I am wearing jeans that are too small. Yep, these past three weeks I have had a record low in physical activity. I just can't seem to find ANY reasonable time to practice yoga...

See, I believe we don't talk enough about body acceptance, body image and how our culture, self talk and the media plays into how we feel about ourselves. Oh, we wax poetic, especially in yoga, about accepting ones own body, practicing with mindfulness, within our own means.

However, the reality is that we all have moments where we ruminate on how our jeans are fitting. On being stronger/thinner/prettier.

It's an interesting and tricky thing to balance the need to stay physically active in order to be healthy without stepping into being physically active and dieting in order to be thin.

If we peel back another layer to this "health" onion, we have to acknowledge the barriers to living a physically active and healthy life, especially in yoga. One layer involves being able to adjust our lives to allow for the time to practice. Most of us have to work full time and need to make choices about how we spend our evenings. Some evenings I don't practice yoga because I really just want a break from ANY obligation, including yoga.

Another layer deeper and we can talk about the cost, primary and hidden, of being active. Yoga classes cost money, even the cheap ones. In order to save, I practice yoga at home. It was a choice I had to make. Many people don't have the luxury to take away from working and family life to even consider attending a yoga class. Most classes require that you have transportation to get there (not everyone lives within walking distance to a studio, and public transit is time consuming and unwieldy, especially in Halifax), some sort of appropriate clothing and a yoga mat (or a rental, an extra cost).

Even running, which is generally free, requires a good pair of running shoes or you quickly encounter injuries to your feet, knees and legs.

Today I listened to a radio interview of the hidden health costs of living in Suburbia (on top of the environmental costs). As we are basically going one step further and looking for a house in rural areas, this was an interesting listen. Basically, the further you get, the more you have to drive to get places and the more illnesses from a sedentary life pop up. So, we'll have to work EXTRA hard to stay physically active once we find our first forever home. (No, we can't afford an urban home and even if we could, we don't WANT to live in the city or suburbia. The author being interviewed totally missed that point).

This entire post, though, was prompted because I feel fat in my jeans. There. I said it.

My plan for November, to get back into the yoga habit (which does end up making me feel better all around... my body is screaming for it):
- Tuesdays and once a weekend (and hopefully another evening of the week) are yoga nights
- Wednesdays and Fridays are walk around the neighbourhood with Andrew nights.

Hopefully that will get things back on track.

Now... I think this means I have to go jeans shopping....


  1. I feel fat every day! LOL. Even when I work out. I have often wondered if this is just an individual thing or a mental thing or what....very interesting concept. Anyway, great post!

  2. Hear you, here! I didn't wear jeans for three years due to this very dilemma. I would put them aside, get some new ones, and not give it a second thought! xo.

  3. I've been terrible at staying active this semester. Working all day, most nights and through the weekend. I usually make it to my frisbee game once a week, but even walking the dogs feels like time I can't spare. I don't think this justifies my lack of activity, nor do I want to be 'the-busiest-person-on-the-planet'. I'm resolved to make more time for myself next semester (for exercise and just my general well-being) and really try to limit the number of things I sign on for.

    I feel fat in my jeans too...


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