Yoga-binges... ever have them? I definitely go a little 'manic' on my practice every once in a while. It's a bit disconcerting, but suddenly I found myself (a few weeks ago) realizing that I had been yoga-binging for months. In March I was up to four yoga practices a week, organizing and emailing for coffee and yoga, and cleaning the studio. The result- a complete crash. Every time I thought about practicing for the past few weeks, any time I'd think about yoga in general actually, I had this 'ick' sinking gut feeling.
So much negativity had slowly crept up and in tiny bits attached itself to my semantic concept of 'yoga'. Until these tiny black negativity goo almost completely covered all that was 'yoga' in my thoughts.
After a slight melt down I took the past few weeks 'off' relatively speaking. Only practicing smaller, shorter sequences a few times a week. I stopped proactively organizing coffee and yoga and actually picked up my guitar. The first time I sang since Yule season. Why did I stop? I am a SINGER more than a Yogini.
I haven't given you all an update on Coffee and Yoga, mostly because it has been a very difficult journey. Four months of ridiculous stalker like attempts at networking and trying to convince (ok, almost beg) yoga teachers to actually just meet with me (or even answer my emails and phone calls) had eroded away my sense of self-worth and even diminished my eventual dream of becoming a yoga teacher.
The community here in Halifax has SO many walls, so much negativity between studios that it's so depressing just hearing the *things* so many studio owners have to say (at least the ones who agreed to chat with me). I gave up. It was SO demoralizing, I don't need that.
So, April 6th arrived, I took a deep breath and brought my little sign to JustUs!. I sat down and expected my very lovely and wonderful group of friends to show up, we'd chat about our lives and go home. Group finished.
I was so completely surprised when a lovely woman (that I didn't know!) walked upstairs and introduced herself as a reader of this blog! The beautiful, kind, supportive words she said were like balm on my soul. She was excited about the group, excited about yoga in the park and had such interesting experiences to contribute to our conversation. (thank you so much K!)
Also, Helen Fong, a local teacher (one of few who have been incredibly supportive of Coffee and Yoga), attended the group!
I left with an inkling that, alright, perhaps I should keep this going. We'll try another month (8 limbs of yoga!!).
I still wasn't convinced on the community, until tonight.
It's the New Moon, time for courage, Fire, excitement and energy. Our group of regular yogis all decided it would be cool to 'yoga-crawl' and check out a new studio tonight. Surprisingly, the 7 of us all could go. So we carpooled and went to Dartmouth to check out Sunrise Yoga for Helen's Vinyasa Flow class.
It was like we were flash-mobbing her yoga class, an entire gaggle of us showing up at once, all filling out the 'first timer' forms... It was fantastic. The studio was so warm and welcoming, the people so open. It was such an unbelievable change. Jack, the owner, actually came in and took pictures for the facebook group. Students chatted with each other prior to class... sigh.
My yoga-self has been renewed. I may be practicing more at home for a little while, but it won't be forever. Next week we're going for her Yin class and I'm actually looking very much forward to it!
My spring resolves to renew:
- SING and play the guitar several times a week. It's a must. OH- and learn some new songs (any fun suggestions?)
- casually organize a yoga-crawl with anyone who is interested. And be ok if no one really is. Maybe through twitter...
- Start reading 'The Revenge of Gaia' along with other eco-books...
- Make my own yogurt, cuz I'm tired of the wasteful #5 plastic.
- Take moments to BREATHE and stop. Some quiet moments outside, sipping coffee and enjoying the space and energy around me.
- Actually get excited about our wedding... crafting a special ceremony with Andrew just for us.
- Practice yoga in solitude for shorter periods. A Green Spell was so right, I need to scale down to 20 minutes more often.
did I say play music again? sigh. I feel so passionate and alive when I sing.
Some fun eco-posts coming up soon! :)
What are your New Moon energies telling you?
article copyright of EcoYogini at ecoyogini.blogspot.com
It was great fun having your group all arrive at the studio tonight. Remember to check out the 108 sun salute video on the Sunrise Yoga Facebook fan page. You can also see the group picture that I took.
ReplyDeleteHere is the link to the fan page
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Dartmouth-NS/Sunrise-Yoga-Dartmouth/104683596106
Oh I'm so glad you are feeling better about all this after we emailed! I knew it would start to work out. Things take time. I'm an impatient person and I hate haveing to wait!!!
ReplyDeleteThe new moon is telling me to sleep. Which would be great if cats electrocuting themselves didn't keep waking me up!!!
I love the refreshing energy of this post, Lisa! Sounds like the New Moon is nudging you towards some lovely things. I took my first yin class recently--my regular instructor offered a 2hr workshop as part of his 500hr training, and it was amazing. So intense and soothing.
ReplyDeleteWriting our ceremony was easily the best part of the entire wedding process. We were pretty sick of everything wedding by that point, but we really enjoyed putting the ceremony together. We used language from a workbook that our officiant sent us, and adapted our vows from a Buddhist ceremony. I can send it to you if you like!
Yay, it's nice when things come together like that. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm emailing you my yogurt recipe. I make it every week or 2 so we have something healthy to snack on at work. I make it in a slow cooker.
last night's yoga at sunrise was a GREAT time. chris and i really enjoyed it - we wish it was a wee bit more convenient to get to - but we're definitely up for next week's yin class.
ReplyDeletealso - i definitely support the make-your-own yogurt. and i'd be happy to come make some with you. check out my blog post for the details of how mine went. tasty!
Hah - can I just copy yours?! :)
ReplyDeleteThat New Moon energy is pervasive, creeping into every aspect of my being. From the new site (merci for visiting..and I hope you don't mind I have your name on the links page!!) to creative endeavors to more yoga on-the-mat, I'm just finding Life everywhere.
I hope yours continues on this lovely trend!!
Hey lady! I go through all or nothing bouts with yoga. I find one thing about it to obsess about...and then totally drop it when I'm burned out. Ah, learning balance, one of the greatest things yoga teaches us.
ReplyDeleteI was very sad to read about your heartache related to yoga and community. But, seems like it is turning out great! I adore the idea of a yoga crawl and wish that little ol' Helena had more yoga classes to crash!
And, if I could sing and play the guitar, I would learn Britney's ...Baby One More Time. I heart. Don't judge!!
I've had similar experiences with yoga, and other activities (running, gym, watching movies, dining out...) that I've had to pull back or even stop for a while. But I am curious- I have no idea how much the "average" yogi or yogini practices, but I was surprised to see 4x per week as a "binge". I would think that to be a moderate amount, with daily being overkill and 2-3x being adequate. Whatever ANY of that means. I wonder what others think. I used to run 6x per week but when I decided to add yoga and other things, I had to make a trade-off and now do it 3 or 4.
ReplyDeleteI'm in a yoga break now too, and doing 20-minute sessions after running.
Wow. I had no idea you were going through all that! And I could relate so much.
ReplyDeleteI think any time you start something new (Yoga and Coffee, a new business, whatever), there are periods of intense energy and "stalking." I've felt that way off and on. I have so many people I emailed to ask them some True Beauty questions, and no one responded, so I thought I could bribe people with a giveaway, ha ha...and still nothing! It's so important to me to connect with people in a real way and to share their stories with others...but drumming up interest in that is so hard. I imagine you are going through similarly frustrating processes for Y&C.
And that yoga burnout...oh, man. I was doing an hour or more 4-5 days a week back in December. No wonder I didn't want to get back on the mat! I couldn't maintain that in the heavy, cold days of winter. I find 10-20 minutes to be quite healing, when done with mindfulness. And I always add 10 minutes of meditation to the end. Though I'm looking forward to some warmer weather when I know I'll feel more inspired to do longer practices.
I'm so very happy that you had such a great discussion experience. That must have been just what you needed. I think when we allow ourselves to relax, more of what we're looking for comes to us. (Maybe I need to take a lesson, ha ha!)
And your yoga crawl is totally cool. I wish I had a big group of yoga friends so we could do that! :)
amazing isnt it how easy it is to drift away from what you want - in your case music. And then you forget that creativity is such an important part of your life. Then you start missing something and you are not sure what and then you start feeling bad and you are not sure why. Then you realise and everything is good again!
ReplyDeleteJen
did I say play music again? sigh. I feel so passionate and alive when I sing.
ReplyDeleteSo when are ya gonna post another video?!
ahhh music! the new moon is singing to you :) the Yoga & Coffee & yoga crawls sound like such wonderful fun & community... much strength to you as you pursue these ventures, and your musical inspiration.
ReplyDeletehm, I'm sifting through a lot of changing energies lately, not quite sure what the new moon is telling me!
i was just reading about the "yoga crawl" on your other blog. i love the concept! fun!
ReplyDeleteso glad to hear that you're picking up your guitar again, and i agree with dr jay ~ post some more videos!
my friend has a talent for rewriting 70s rock songs with yoga themes. my favourite is "kali," to the tune of "lola." we spent saturday evening singing "ka-ka-ka-ka kali" and it was unbelievably fun! so perhaps there's a way to combine your music and your yoga...
I am so glad you are feeling fresh and renewed. You are doing so many amazing things and thank goodness you are bravely moving ahead! Looking forward to hearing more about your community's growth! :)
ReplyDeleteI hear ya on many counts. It can be so hard, as others are sharing here, to generate excitement and interest. I feel like we're so "busy" (whatever that means) and taken with the urgency of the web and email and day to day that we forget to get back to what's real and important in life -- like these kinds of connections! You are a wonderful reminder.
ReplyDeleteJust a music note... not sure of your style preferences, but my favorite singer is Patty Griffin and she soothes the soul with her guitar. Try Trapeze, Sweet Lorainne, Useless Desires... and all the rest!!
Glad you're feeling rejuved... be well!