tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2965370542440002490.post5714824065092053827..comments2024-03-25T16:24:52.850-03:00Comments on Eco Yogini: A Conversation about Stuff- Guest Post!Eco Yoginihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10693080137196812405noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2965370542440002490.post-45829520773895078102011-01-22T12:46:01.703-04:002011-01-22T12:46:01.703-04:00@EcoGrrl: I agree, and (with Chara's expansion...@EcoGrrl: I agree, and (with Chara's expansion later one) I think that's exactly what Chara was doing with her daughter.<br /><br />@La Gitane: oh my goodness, my mom tried to do that- didn't succeed ever. But then, 25 years ago we didn't have the same culture of "stuff" that we do now.... things have changed. I do agree, out of sight out of mind. Sometimes I keep things cuz I think I need them- just yesterday I was wondering about a few boxes of "stuff" i had in the closet... adn what was in them.<br /><br />@Alli:I agree, we're told everywhere about shopping. I don't think myself as a non-parent that I really understand just how difficult it can be in our culture of CONSUME to teach children about stuff. <br /><br />Chara's right- we have an inner dialogue going on and a lifetime of learning about consequences, about critical thinking (for the most of us anyway).<br />A five year old? Ummm... Chara has a point that a change in how we address this increase in consumer culture and it's affects on our children can't just happen with how we were raised.<br />Every family is different, every child is different and if there is anything I have learned from working with my clients and their families is that there is no "right" answer to parenting.Eco Yoginihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10693080137196812405noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2965370542440002490.post-35572876745768701992011-01-22T11:00:08.197-04:002011-01-22T11:00:08.197-04:00Thanks everyone for the comments on the post so fa...Thanks everyone for the comments on the post so far. EcoGrrl - I totally agree with spoiling. (I didn't say in my post that my daughters fit resulted in me picking her up in my arms and carrying her out of Frenchy's with tears flowing down her face and her saying "I'll be good now.." And I definately think it is soooo important to continually say to our kids (and I do) "just because you want something, doesn't mean you get it" but I think my point is also that they need to hear us say "oh I really would like to buy that X but I don't need it and it looks to made cheaply and will probably fall apart. I am going to wait until our X is unrepairable and then find a really good one that will last." I think we forget that what our kids see when we are shopping is us picking things up, putting them in carts and then swiping our debit cards. They don't hear our inner thoughts about quality and needs or debate over price. And La Gitane...I really like your mom's tactics. I secretly clear out her room about once a month - clean out the mounds of drawings and paperwork, the dried up markers, the loose sparkles, and then the toys and books that haven't been played with/read in awhile. I tried doing it with her and it was a bit more drama than it was worth. But with my cleanups, if there is anything I am debating, I put it in a box and see if there are any requests for it after the fact. And I think out of sight out of mind is a good philosophy for all - kid or grownup. I sometimes do this with my own stuff! It is a good measure for whether or not something has value to you. Alli, I appreciate the comment about it being hard not to shop when we grew up with it. I think that is the case if you, like me, have people in your family who inundate you with goods for you or your kids on a regular basis. It can cause stress you never thought was possible. "Oh no. Another package..." I guess that is why I wrote the post. We live in a culture where our kids are exposed to more the the "take" or "get" or "buy"..(funny story: I actually had a number of five year olds guests dis me at my daughter's b.d. party b/c I didn't do "loot bags"-instead they had a take-away headband craft and were given a thankyou note with a hairclip attached. "Is this all we get? Is there any candy?" Seriously! Dissed!)I guess my point about "conversations about stuff" is talking through our thoughts with our kids. And even though I have a store of handmade Canadian goods and talk about the importance of shopping handmade/local/artisan, I realized after that Frenchy's she is just a kid and I need to be more clear about what is going on within mind and how I make decisions. <br /><br />Sorry Lisa for the long winded comment. Sometimes there is just soooo much more to say and it is hard to stop talking (especially for me). Thanks again for the opportunity to do a guest post. Good fun!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2965370542440002490.post-23650033726705615922011-01-22T09:22:07.659-04:002011-01-22T09:22:07.659-04:00Wherever we turn we are told to buy stuff... even ...Wherever we turn we are told to buy stuff... even if you already have it this one is new and improved! It is hard to fight it especially when you grow up surrounded by it. We are lucky in that the great majority of our stuff are hand-me-downs (like our couch set), items that I have had since I was a child (TV from 1982) or second hand (clothes from value village). There are of course exceptions but when we buy new stuff we buy to make it last as long as possible. For example, cast iron pans...those will last forever! We also try as much as possible to buy local here in Halifax but since my partner is from Mexico we do buy a lot of handmade items from there to bring back with us. However, it is always hard to fight off the urge to shop when that was encouraged growing up. <br /><br />Shopping is a hard nut to crack and to curb my shopping bug I head to Value Village and try on everything under the sun but leave with only the item(s) I really love or need.<br /><br />Thanks for the great post!Allihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18387430912583880104noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2965370542440002490.post-72086386076882557312011-01-22T05:45:24.176-04:002011-01-22T05:45:24.176-04:00When I was little, my mom used guerilla tactics to...When I was little, my mom used guerilla tactics to clean up our stuff: she would clear out our old toys and books and put them all in giant green garbage bag on a high shelf in the basement. If we missed and could name a specific item, we could have it back. But 9 times out of 10 - out of sight, out of mind. ;) It's only when the stuff is right in front of us that we think we need it!Yogini Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00787351711548823249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2965370542440002490.post-21961325130793723422011-01-22T03:18:17.380-04:002011-01-22T03:18:17.380-04:00good post. the interesting thing about the many d...good post. the interesting thing about the many discussions of 'stuff' is one key thing that seems to usually be missing when folks talk about all the things their kids have. not buying all that stuff is also not spoiling them rotten. sorry but i have to be blunt on this as i hear so many parents these days overloading their kids with whatever they want, giving in, giving in. let them throw a fit. and let them grow up not thinking they get everything they want. just because i wanted stuff when i was growing up doesn't mean i got it - plain and simple.EcoGrrlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04856550147714231721noreply@blogger.com